I had never seen Cat so steamed.
“Poison, look at this shit!” she said. We were at the breakfast table at our place. Cat tossed over a copy of In the ALTernative, the local weekly that covered the club scene.
She pointed to a headline: JENNY X COULD BE NEXT TOP BITCH.
It was an article about this lame competition put on every year by the staff of In the
ALTernative at Club Lucifer, to name the city’s top punk woman of the year. It was a beauty contest, no less.
Too sexist? Too objectifying? As if we gave a shit. This thing was so lame that normally it ran under our radar, and would have this year, if it hadn’t been for one factor: Jenny X. Cat despised Jenny X, mainly because they were so much alike. Blonde, sexy, and out to stomp the world under their heels.
“Jenny X, who narrowly lost Punkette of the Year honors last year, is the odds-on favorite to be named the epitome of punk femininity this year,” read the article, written by a guy who signs himself Tommy the Toad. No doubt, Jenny had promised Tommy a blow job if he wrote the article. Knowing Jenny, there would be no payoff until she saw the article in print.
“This is NOT going to happen,” Cat snarled. “I’ll make sure of that!”
“Going to enter the twins?” I asked. Sass and Britt were flat the most beautiful girls on campus. With Sass picking out their costumes, there is no way that double entry couldn’t win.
“No,” Cat said.
“Going to enter yourself?” Cat could pull it off, maybe not as handily as the twins, but she could do it. Though I really couldn’t see Cat strutting across a stage in an emo version of Miss America.
Cat took her time replying.
“No,” she said. “I’m going to manage.”
Despite its lameness, Punkette of the Year had grown in popularity so much that now, instead of individual girls just signing up, applicants sought out managers to guide them through the contest.
Our talk turned to other things. Eventually, we left the table to start our days.
I didn’t see Cat that afternoon, and she was scarce the rest of the week. We figured she had spent her time looking for and grooming a Punkette candidate.
Sass and Britt and I arrived at Club Lucifer early on the night of the competition. Cat and her candidate were coming separately. We had ordered our boy-toys to come and back Cat’s candidate, and about twenty of them had shown up.
Jenny X already was there, surrounded by her sycophants. Her costume was so hot it had my clit buzzing with desire.
Jenny had opted for a “sexy schoolgirl” costume. She certainly looked like a graduate of the School for Scandal.
The costume was based loosely on a Catholic school uniform for girls. Jenny wore a green plaid skirt so skimpy it concealed nothing, certainly not her white thong or garter belt, which held up a pair of fancy white stockings. Her top was a white blouse, unbuttoned, but tied just under her tits in a knot. A little plaid school tie was around her neck. The blouse did not conceal her white bra straps. A pair of white, five-inch heels completed the outfit.
Cat and her candidate arrived about a half hour before the contest began.
Cat introduced her candidate to us as Heidi Dragon. She was Asian and perhaps as fine a fox as could be. She almost looked better than Sass and Britt.
It was kinda weird. Heidi seemed a bit familiar.
Heidi wore a deceptively sensual outfit, in contrast to the busy-ness of Jenny’s costume. It included a simple black, pleated skirt, and a black top that covered her completely, including shoulders and all the way down her arms to her wrists. Her hose was black and so were her heels. She wore a simple, heart-shaped broach at her waist.
Simple, but extremely effective. It made me forget about Jenny’s look.
The first round of the contest was the beauty part, which Jenny and Heidi clean wiped out.
The second part would be — get this — the talent competition, which consisted of each of the finalists lip-synching to their favorite song. Did I mention this contest was lame?
In the meantime, both finalists were assigned to dressing rooms to chill out in. The lights didn’t work in the one they gave Heidi, but we didn’t really care. It was a place to stash our contestant away from Jenny X and her cohort. Cat assigned me to sit with Heidi, while she and the twins stood guard outside the door.
I told Heidi how hot I thought her outfit was.
“I’m glad you like it,” she replied in a heavily-Asian accent. “I just love your tattoos. In my country, tattooed women are considered very sexy.”
It really was too dark to see, but I did feel Heidi laid a hand on my thigh. I responded by putting my hand on top of hers, and soon we were necking.
“Would you like to make love?” Heidi asked. “I have a strap-on in my purse and there is time.”
Would I mind? This is Poison you’re talking to, girl!
I heard Heidi search around in her purse as I shagged down my jeans and panties. I was already wet.
I had been sitting in a chair next to Heidi, and I got up and bent over it. I felt the Asian girl’s hand stroking my ass cheeks and heard the noises she made as she knelt down behind me. Soon, I felt her tongue licking all over my cheeks, making a detour here and there to lick inside either my asshole or my cunt. After a few minutes of this, she stood and used her hands to spread my cheeks. I shuddered as I felt the head of the strap-on penetrate my pussy lips. She pushed in slowly, putting the whole length of the dildo inside of me. She drew back out slowly, then suddenly plunged back in. She got a good, steady rhythm going and soon I felt my orgasm building. I let my breath out in a huge sigh when it did hit.
“I really ought to pay you back for that,” I said as Heidi disengaged and I pulled up my pants.
“But there is no time,” she answered. “Maybe later tonight?”
Just then Cat stuck her head in the door. “It’s time,” she said.
Jenny was up first. For some reason, she had chosen Madonna’s version of “Santa Baby” to lip synch. OK, I admit it’s a sexy song ready-made for bumps and grinds, but it was the middle of August, for Christ’s sake!
Heidi’s — or rather, Cat’s — selection was much smarter. Pat Benatar’s “Hit Me With Your Best Shot.”
Heidi’s expressions were so precious and her smile so enchanting that she really got the crowd going.
Punkette of the Year was chosen by the crowd at the end of the talent segment. The emcee conducted the voting by holding his hand over the head of each competitor and listening to the crowd reaction.
Jenny X got a good round of applause — and not all from just her people, either — but when the emcee held his hand over Heidi’s head, the crowd exploded. Heidi was the hit of the evening.
Cat had taken the stage behind Heidi, and as soon as Heidi was crowned, Cat reached under her skirt and pulled her panties down. Heidi lifted her skirt, revealing a nine-inch cock. Heidi’s grin could have out shown the sun.
Cat couldn’t have been more pleased. A cross dresser with a monster penis had just been named “the epitome of punk femininity” over her arch-rival, Jenny X.
Heidi, it turned out, was really Edwin Cho, one of our boy-toys and a Korean exchange student at the university. Edwin is a bit effeminate-looking to start with, and Cat is an expert at cosmetics. Cat had fitted Edwin out with breast and butt forms and chose his outfit to flatter his new curves.
Edwin was so pleased with the feminization job Cat had done that he quit school and became Heidi full time. You can see her ads for “Asian TV Escort Service” in the back pages of In the ALTernative.
This being the alt world, Heidi was of course allowed to keep her Punkette of the Year title. In the ALTernative even published a photo taken after Cat had pulled Heidi’s pants down, with the raised hem showing every little — excuse me, every nine inches of — thing. The headline was “TOP BITCH IS A BOY.”
And yes, I realize that was no strap-on.